Pools, Cheetos and Automobiles.

Hey earthlings.
Just got back from the road trip from Hades. My week seriously has been a Lifetime movie. Well, except it didn't end with me marrying the lonely doctor who just moved in across the street. And I don't hear an upbeat Sheryl Crow pop hit in the background.
So, had a fun little spring break weekend and THEN... dun dun dummmm. (dramatic music)
3 hours from home my tire blew out. I drive the worlds biggest, most hypocritical (for a hippy like me), earth polluting, gas guzzling SUV in the world, so of COURSE there was no shop in Shepardsville, KY with a tire big enough. Oh, and my spare had a cut.  So, I got stuck there for 2 days.
During the course of the stay, my nephew got sick and was vomiting Hot Cheetos everywhere. (I will never be the same.) The hotel we stayed at was renovating and the toilet wouldn't flush. (2 pre-teen nephews. One 5 year old. I held it for 2 days.)  I left all of my veggie stuff I'd packed for the trip at my Mom's, so my belly was swollen from starvation.  All my clothes were packed in my truck so I had to strut around in my 'road trip Daisy Dukes' (that my Mom called inappropriate to wear in public - or at home).  I had to make about 14 trips to Walmart for emergency supplies. (But I guess I fit in with my gut and butt hanging out everywhere.)  I think they filled the hotel pool with straight up Clorox - no water - so I was rubbing my eyes so much I ripped a contact.  The tow truck charge was almost as much as the tire. OH, and when I finally made it home I realized my wallet was gone. Yep. Gone. Still gone.
So I've been laughing hysterically because what's the point of crying. I'd probably rip another contact. The raddest thing ever though is that my son came up to me when we got home, wrapped his little arms around me and said: "Thanks for the adventure, Mama." I know. Great ending.
Take it on home, Sheryl!
Love,
t


11 comments

  • Josh
    Josh
    funnier than your text. Only u!!!! :laugh:

    funnier than your text. Only u!!!! laugh

  • Lauryn
    Lauryn
    TISH! OMG. I am so glad you are back and safe. I'm also glad that you can laugh at yourself. Its great that kids always see things better than grownups. So cute! Luv ya girlie!

    TISH! OMG. I am so glad you are back and safe. I'm also glad that you can laugh at yourself. Its great that kids always see things better than grownups. So cute!
    Luv ya girlie!

  • Michael
    Michael
    You are so funny! Dont even know where to start. My little Tish. SMH! :laugh:

    You are so funny! Dont even know where to start. My little Tish. SMH! laugh

  • Jennifer
    Jennifer
    Tish, you have a way of making everything fun:laugh: 'Member the lockout?! LOL Your shorts are inappropriate btw, your mom is right. JK, I'm just jealous of your tiny little hips. Hate you! Eat, dammit!

    Tish, you have a way of making everything funlaugh 'Member the lockout?! LOL
    Your shorts are inappropriate btw, your mom is right. JK, I'm just jealous of your tiny little hips. Hate you! Eat, dammit!

  • Derrick
    Derrick
    HOT CHEETOS. NO!

    HOT CHEETOS. NO!

  • Matt
    Matt
    youre pretty awesome, miss tish. :love:

    youre pretty awesome, miss tish. love

  • Brian
    Brian
    MMMMM, Tish Lyndey. First Imma need to see them daisy dukes.Stat!HAHAHAH!

    MMMMM, Tish Lyndey. First Imma need to see them daisy dukes.Stat!HAHAHAH!

  • Courtney
    Courtney
    Only you, sister. I swears. Miss and love you muchly - MUST find my way to the Nash one day soon. Looooovvveee to you and little M.

    Only you, sister. I swears. Miss and love you muchly - MUST find my way to the Nash one day soon. Looooovvveee to you and little M.

  • E-Boogie
    E-Boogie
    The only thing missing from this story is the Great The Wal-Mart Caper and the Search for Toxic-Hell but maybe that's not appropriate here. Prolly not.

    The only thing missing from this story is the Great The Wal-Mart Caper and the Search for Toxic-Hell but maybe that's not appropriate here. Prolly not.

  • Scott
    Scott
    Miguel is going 2 look back and have so many funny stories. I bet living with you is a blast! You really are I LOVE LUCY! HAHA

    Miguel is going 2 look back and have so many funny stories. I bet living with you is a blast! You really are I LOVE LUCY! HAHA

  • Jonathan
    Jonathan
    Tish Lyndsey. What does one say. :love:

    Tish Lyndsey. What does one say. love

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